By Robin Austin Reed
We know what physical intimacy is. From sex ed. courses in middle school to Cosmo magazines in high school to the trial-and-error that would constitute our becoming, we know exactly what physical intimacy is. Yet, after having it, we realize it’s empty. It’s in that moment that we realize we are more than our physical forms, and that whatever that “more” is, craves more of itself. It wants to see itself, and experience itself with and through someone else.
Intimacy is a sacred space of connection, where two are still individuals but the lines of differentiation blur and the division of separation evaporates to nothingness. An overlay of playful humor blankets you, laughing in acknowledgment: this space is where we always were, we are only now becoming conscious of it, for a moment in time. Isn’t that the undertone of intimacy? Feeling at once as though you’re arriving at some sought-after, far-off shore, yet right back into the comfort of your childhood home?
Intimacy is the art of allowing defenses to ease, letting the nudity of your soul be reformatted to a new normal – an easier normal, a more comfortable normal. You are truly seen, as spirit, as physical, as heart and soul and it’s all blended into one. Forgiveness runs a lovely and gentle course, grace flows from the belly of our truest self and a constant outdoing of each other’s affections gives a peaceful reminder that you, are always on the other person’s mind, heart and soul.
It’s love without form, without attachment and without judgment. Intimacy has no opinions eager for validation, no vanity that robs the other from the true mirror of self reflection when you look into your partner’s eyes. Realness keeps you warm, intention keeps you safe and together, you both agree to step into a circle of sacredness where time stops and a third entity is birthed to coddle and create.
Intimacy. It’s more than a word, a state of momentary bliss, orgasmic release or a burden for the attached with licenses of marriage or domestic partnerships. It, this thing, this described state…is a place of unadulterated purity, where universe partners with us to heal, reunite to oneness and experience bliss.
Perhaps intimacy, this state we all crave and desire begins with oneself.
Image: Franca Giminez